Remote (but emotionally available)
Corporate Girlfriend - Empathy-Engineer™
PsychologyEmotional IntelligenceActive ListeningMeme FluencyCrisis Management
ABOUT
We know. You saw the title and thought, "This has to be a meme." But burnout isn't. Isolation isn't. Emotional whiplash in tech? Definitely not. So, yes — we're hiring a Corporate Girlfriend. But no, not that kind. We're looking for a licensed psychologist, therapist, or empathy-engineer who can become the emotional support system for our remote-first dev team that talks to more APIs than people. This isn't a PR stunt (okay, maybe 20%). It's a protest — against soulless HR manuals, forced fun Fridays, and the idea that shipping faster matters more than feeling okay.
RESPONSIBILITIES
Host 1:1s that feel more like heart-to-hearts
Drop surprise memes into Slack that emotionally slap
Help teammates break up with imposter syndrome
Build burnout recovery playlists for launch weeks
Organize emotional stand-ups disguised as coffee catchups
Spot mental health red flags before Jira does
COMPENSATION
Emotional equity + actual money + real-world perks
EMPLOYMENT TYPE
Full-Time / Part-Time (Your vibe matters more than your hours)
BENEFITS
Weekly team dinner (yes, with candles. yes, on us.)
Annual vacation with your assigned "emotional client" (trust us, they need it)
Therapy budget (for yourself too — emotional labor is labor)
A team that respects memes as much as metrics
Unlimited (awkward but sincere) hugs and validation
YOU MIGHT BE A PERFECT FIT IF...
You've ever said "That's not burnout, that's betrayal trauma from tech."
Your Google Drive has a folder titled Mood Board: Emotional Support Memes
You make people feel safe within the first 3 minutes of conversation
You speak fluent Slack sarcasm AND actual empathy
You can calm chaos — with cookies, candor, or Coldplay
IMPORTANT CLARIFICATIONS
This is NOT a dating service
You won't fetch coffee or take meeting notes
You WILL be the soul of the team
You WILL help us make emotional wellness not just performative, but cultural
SKILLS
PsychologyEmotional IntelligenceActive ListeningMeme FluencyCrisis Management
HIRING MANAGER
Shilpi Dutta
HR Manager